Here are 8 practical, Biblical keys to help you make friends and build the kind of relationships that truly matter.
1. Go First
Friendship takes initiative. You can’t just sit back and wait for someone else to make the first move. Start the conversation, send that text, or invite someone out for coffee. Find common interests with a potential friend to keep the conversation going.
Proverbs 20:4 puts it this way: “Sluggards do not plow in season; so at harvest time they look but find nothing.” If you’re not willing to take action, you can’t expect strong relationships to grow.
Jesus modeled this perfectly. In John 1:38-39, he invited two curious disciples to “come and see” where he was staying. That simple invitation led to them becoming part of his inner circle. Imagine what could happen if you take that first step!
2. Be Patient
Let’s face it, deeper friendships don’t form overnight. It takes time to build trust and connection. Even Jesus, after 3 years with his disciples, said, “I no longer call you servants…instead, I have called you friends” (John 15:15).
Meaningful relationships take small, consistent efforts over time. So, be patient and give it time to grow.
3. Be Realistic
Not every person you meet is going to become a lifelong friend, and that’s okay. Even Jesus had different levels of relationships. He taught thousands, sent out 70, shared life with 12, and was closest to just 3 (Peter, James, and John).
Don’t feel discouraged if every friendship isn’t deep. Trust God’s timing and be open to surprises—sometimes the least expected people become the most meaningful friends.
4. Be Vulnerable
If you keep things shallow, your relationships will stay shallow. True friendships require us to be vulnerable.
Galatians 6:2 tells us to “carry each other’s burdens.” But no one can help carry your burdens if they don’t know what they are!
It can feel risky to open up. As C.S. Lewis famously said, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one!'”
5. Be Wise
Vulnerability is important, but so is discernment. It’s not about spilling your heart out to everyone right away. Proverbs 13:3 reminds us, “Those who guard their lips preserve their lives.”
Sharing too much too soon can overwhelm a budding friendship. Take your time, read the room, and let trust grow naturally.
6. Add Value
Friendships thrive when we focus on serving others. Proverbs 11:25 says, “A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.”
Be the kind of friend who adds value by helping, listening, or showing up when it matters. You don’t have to do grand gestures. Simple acts of kindness and spending time with someone goes a long way in building deeper connections.
7. Be Brave
Friendships can be messy. Even your close friends will disappoint you from time to time.
Think about Jesus and Peter—Peter denied Jesus, but their friendship didn’t end there.
Proverbs 27:6 says, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted.” Sometimes, it takes honesty and openness to grow a friendship, and yes, that can hurt. But don’t let fear stop you from investing in people. Trust that it’s worth the risk.
8. Be Missional
When you’re living on mission for something bigger than yourself, friendships often happen naturally. People who share your values and purpose tend to come alongside you on the journey.
As Jesus demonstrated, real friends often form as a byproduct of shared goals. If you’re focused on serving others and living for God, you’ll find good friends who are on the same mission.
Making friends takes effort, but it’s so worth it. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us, “Two are better than one… if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” By following these simple, Biblical principles, you can start building lasting friendships that will bless your life—and theirs.
